Wednesday, April 9, 2014

I didn't know you but..

Peaches with Her two sons Astala & Phaedra.
As I write , the world is in shock from the sudden death of Peaches Geldof. She was 25. A mum of 2 boys:
Peaches with one of her sons.
Astala and Phaedra.  Astala turns 2 this month and Phaedra turns 1 this month.  My oldest  Cody turns 9 the day after Phaedra celebrates his 1st birthday.

I chatted on Instagram a few times with Peaches, she thought I was a super hero of some sort because I had 4 boys. I simply told her, there is a light at the end of the sleep deprivation tunnel and I had come out of that tunnel semi sane.  Peaches was younger then me, (I am almost 28), when I was 25 I was a mum of 3 boys. Peaches was a kind , person. I never saw her be unkind to anyone online.

Some may have never heard of her.  I followed her on instagram. She was very vocal on attachment parenting.  She had overcome struggles, some in the public eye.  Many celebrities are fans of attachment parenting  (Tributes to peaches)
"Becoming a mother was like becoming me, finally," she said.
"After years of struggling to know myself, feeling lost at sea, rudderless and troubled, having babies through which to correct the multiple mistakes of my own traumatic childhood was beyond healing."I felt finally anchored in place, with lives that literally depend on me, and I am not about to let them down, not for anyone or anything. 
Since I've had the boys, I don't think of the world as a negative place any more. I just have so much love. And, through my love for them, I've been reborn into a better, more understanding, more patient person – I feel like an adult." - Peaches Geldof

Charlie in the ergo in 2010 age 2.

Peaches, 

I didn't know you personally, in fact we never once met. I want you and your family to know I will miss your instagram posts. I hope Astala & Phaedra grow into  kind souls like their mum. I had my second when my first was 18 months old, it was hard work. It was exhausting.  i think the first year was a blur of nappies & feeds. I too feel that i was reborn into a better person once I had children.  I had mild PND after having my second son. I struggled and every now and then I still do struggle , parenting isn't an easy gig.

Those  few years of being stuck in a blur of nappies, and sleep deprivation and exhaustion, do end. Eventually, those little people  grow into  slightly bigger people. They still have their needs etc but  the exhaustion and sleep deprivation normally eases off.  By then , you somehow have become a pro at this gig , and other parents look at you like you just seem to have it all together, you are an expert.  But you learnt it all on the job, each day comes with new challenges and there is no one book or manual to tell you the holy grail of answers in how to raise kids.

parenting 4 boys isn't the easiest gig. 
Alistair and I, with him in the ergo. 
whilst I can not imagine the heart break Peaches's family and friends feel right now. I  hope they find comfort in the messages on her instagram from all those she chatted with and touched in some way.


Peaches taking on Kate Hopkins
Her last interview



In my eyes , what ended her life doesn't matter.  Two little boys have lost their mum. 




For more info check out:
Attachment Parenting Australia 
Attachment parenting: Is it the superior Option?
A mother's needs: the down side to attachment parenting=
celebrities who have been open about their parenting struggles such as PND
celebrities who do attachment parenting

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